Christmas Party and SNOW!

Well my first teacher's Christmas party was pretty good. The atmosphere of this restaurant was amazing and the food was great (even if it did take 2.5 hours to get everything!) I sat next to an interesting character who was full of advice and trivia. My date was another wife who's husband deployed a few weeks ago- she was awesome! She even walked me to my car and when I realized I left my wallet at the restaurant she rode her bike back there and grabbed it for me- Thank you Gina!
Today I woke up to SNOW on the ground :-)

After a horrible night's "sleep" it was just what I needed. I even had a few minutes to play in it before church. At church today the Christmas play kids performed the first song (Joy to the World) at each service (9, 10:45, 12:30).

They did so great! I was such a proud Mama bear lol. Between performances I played out in the snow with a few of the kids and had lunch at McDonalds with my FRG leader and her kids. Very nice morning indeed! I just finished getting my house clean with the exception of the floors which I'll wait til the night before Matt comes home. Now I'm going to take a much needed nap before babysitting my Baby Gadi tonight so his parents can go watch New Moon!
Matt must be enjoying WLC as he's "forgotten" to call me a lot this week! I'm glad he's enjoying it and it sounds like he's learning alot. He's really spoiled to 3 full meals a day which I already warned him to enjoy it while he lasts lol. He'll be home in 5.5 days!!!

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Am I really pregnant??

Today I didn't even "feel" pregnant. No symptoms except for extreme exhaustion (I almost fell asleep in the library). Am I really pregnant? I feel this heavy pit in my stomach of worry that something is going to happen. I know I need to give it to God and I trust He'll do what's right...but what's right may not be what I like...

In good news: my friend Amanda designed my Daddy tshirt to surprise Matt with! She also made a matching Mommy one for me- it's so cute! She also designed my announcements which I can NOT wait to mail out!! I'll add those to the photo album right now!

Haha I just remembered that tomorrow is our staff Christmas party at a resteraunt downtown and I had preordered a mimosa. Whoops! Guess they'll have to make that straight OJ for me- hope noone notices me asking...not sure when to tell the ladies at the school yet...

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Tis the Season

Well this has been a long week! I am so exhausted all the time! But the kids have been great. Just been coming home and crashing so sorry I haven't posted! Matt on the other hand seems to really be enjoying WLC (although today he had a 5 mile run so he may think different). Right now he's the First Sgt. and loving the "fun power trip"!
We are so excited for Christmas. We keep arguing over who has the best gift for the other person. I win hands down but can't say in case he reads this!! I'm so ready to see all the families on the webcam! I mailed out ALMOST everyone's gifts by now (sheesh shipping for all that stuff is NOT fun!) just a couple more people tomrorow and I'll be DONE!

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1st OB appt Scheduled!

Went to Tricare today and got my first OB appt. scheduled. Two of my friends recommended the head OB at the hospital I'll deliver at AND she's a PreNatal specialist which apparently I have to see because I had a previous miscarriage AND because of my mother's history (and lack of both of our father's histories). I see her on Dec. 22 so I will be telling Matt before then because he should be off and able to come with me!!! I MAY even get an ultrasound *fingers crossed* (I still hope there's twins...)

I am also doing alot of research on BabyCenter.com which is great because some of it has reassured my mind (like the fact I'm cramping) but its so scary to see ALLLLL these women who have miscarried- and even in their 12th week! The question was when to tell your family and alot of responses were to just forget about previous miscarriages and celebrate the JOY of this miracle. Let your family feel Joy too and tell them when you feel ready. IF you were to miscarry you would want their support so why expect their support in your sadness when you can't trust them with your joy? By Dec. 21 I will be 7 weeks. I will talk to Matt of course but I really want to surprise our families on Christmas via webcam. I want to see their faces!! Trusting in God means you have to "ready your fields" and I feel like if I DON'T tell my family and close friends then I'm not putting my faith in Him to care for this baby.

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Symptoms?

The last few days I had been very nauseated but today I was ok for the most part. Maybe it was just those boogers at school makin me sick! It's so hard to talk to people and not tell them! Today my mentor teacher for next semester made a comment how she'll be in Italy up til Aug. 20 and she may need me to come in and help her rush to get ready for the beginning of the year and all I kept thinking was....I'll have just had the baby!! Or yesterday at the Christmas play practice a lady had made Tuna Mac for us. Normally I love it but a) it did NOT smell good last night and B) I don't think you can eat tuna when you're pregnant? Anyways she just kept asking "Are you sure you don't want any? Just take some. Do you not like it?" and of course I didn't want to lie- especially in church!- so I kept saying I wasn't hungry and that I couldn't eat tuna. Bah!

Today I also walked through the miniscule (literally- one aisle) baby section at the PX and almost started crying... I can't believe that I will be buying that stuff soon!! Oh and too bad there's no Parents Choice diapers here...I hope my baby can wear the Select (PX) brand lol. Phew. I started reading "What to Expect" and couldn't put it down last night. Oh and I'm still waking up around 5ish and not being able to fall back asleep! That coupled with the no-caffenine is killing me! No wonder pregnant women are so tired- its not the baby its the other factors.

Anyways this blog was supposed to be about symptoms. Ok is it normal to be cramping this much?? I asked the doc yesterday and she just said "It depends" and then proceeded to say she wanted to test me again. I googled "pregnancy cramping" and the March of Dimes site said in the first month it said it can be normal because your body is stretching, etc. I hope so...it REALLY feels like I'm about to get my period at any moment. The stomach cramps, back ache, diarrhea...I keep running to the bathroom just to make sure I haven't started. I thought I'd be glad when the first trimester was over and I could breathe with relief BUT I just heard of a woman miscarring at 21 weeks!!! EEK! I guess I should get used to the worrying...Moms do that alot ;-)


Gender Predictor:
Ok 4/6 (2/3) of the gender predictor tests I've takin say Girl...which is what I feel like to! Whenever I think about baby I think in terms of her/she...Idk why maybe (hopefully!) it's mother's intuition again! The old wives test aren't very helpful yet because I'm not far enough along...I'll try them next month (or whenever I start showing).



Man I should be studying for my certification test...its so hard to focus on the boring material when there's so much INTERESTING stuff I want to read about!!! Like pregnancy??

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1st Dr. Visit

No not the OBGyn but I went to meet with my regular dr. I needed a form signed for work so I decided to kill 2 birds with one stone and get my referral going to see an OB. Here in Germany there are no OBs on post- they refer you to a german OB. I've heard they're better: more thorough and take their time with you at each appointment. My dr. recommended I get the H1N1 shot so I got that done as well as a TB test I needed for that work form. I also took another pregnancy test for her and (shock!) it was positive as well! So I got a folder full of OB information and such. I am possibly due Aug. 9 but that could changed based on the ultrasound. Speaking of they want me to see the OB by or around Jan. 7 (10 weeks). I am 5 weeks and 1 day today!!!

She confirmed that I should quit caffenine but that I should do it slowly-cutting back half a cup every two days. I think I'll be ok though. Today I was very tired but I didn't get that killer headache I was dreading. Maybe my body knows I can't have it and its going on easy on me (maybe..). If the headache comes tomorrow I'll do just half a cup of soda or coffee. Oh and she told me I can't take any meds BUT tylenol!! Benadryl is ok as well but my wonderful Tylenol Severe and Allergy and Multisymptom are a no go because they have phenalsomething in them. AHH! Guess I need to go read my What to Expect book I just bought!

It's KILLING me not to be able to shout the news to everyone I see!!!! Matt needs to come home NOW! I wanted SO BAD to call everyone last night...I swear I want to tell you so don't be mad when you finally read this!! I have to tell the "baby daddy" first! :-)

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Wow there's a plus sign!!

So I just literally took the test. About 10 minutes ago to be precise. I saw the plus sign and clamped my hand over my mouth and nearly threw up (which I've been fighting not to do all day). Then I just kept saying "Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god" over and over. The dogs looked at me like I'm crazy. My first instinct was to call Matt of course but he is in WLC (Sgt. School)...plus I REALLY want to see his face when he hears the news. I'm thinking of wrapping the test up and giving it like a present on Christmas...if not the day he returns. I don't know if I can keep this a secret. Well after all that flashed through my mind I went to call Adri. As the best friend she is the next in line (well technically she comes first but for this matter- she's next in line). She didn't answer!! Then I tried to call Jen. SHE didn't answer. Next I cried for a few seconds. And thanked God. And thought- "omg am I ready??? I always talk about it, I've imagined soo many things, but now that there's a plus sign- am I ready?? Is Matt??? What was I thinking!!!" Then I thought: "what if I miscarry again? I can't handle that." Now I'm rambling. I don't want to tell anyone until Matt knows. And that won't be until the 18th at the earliest. Plus I need to see the Doctor. Like tomorrow.

(after the 1st paragraph I kept coming back and adding new thoughts. Not like I have anyone to discuss all this with- but now that all of you know- you will know exactly what was going through my head. Each new paragraph is another time I came back to add something)

Why did I take the test? Well I wasn't going to until tomorrow or Wednesday (when my period should have ended) but then I've just had this gut feeling, like I've NEVER had before, that I was pregnant (the beginning of Mother's Intuition?). So I recounted my calendar and what do you know but I should have ENDED my period yesterday but it never came. I recounted all my previous 3 periods and they were all exactly 28 days apart. Plus this last week my boobs have been SO sore to the slightest touch. And like I said earlier I've been fighting back naseau all day (like gritting my teeth to prevent it!) So with all of those factors and the fact that EVERYONE is either about to have a baby or just found out they're expecting (and Amanda W's facebook status really made me go hmmm maybe I should just take it...her status said she'll never forget Dec. 7 when that blue line showed up and now she has 2 miracle babies) well now I'LL never forget Dec. 7 either... Speaking of Amanda...what if its twins? OMG I would be so excstatic! Matt would die....

I went off the pill 3 months ago after I had missed 3 periods in a row and kept getting negative pregnancy tests. I was convinced I must be pregnant but all the tests said no- even the blood test. So my doctor wanted to do a blood work up on me to test all sorts of things- thyroid, hormones, etc but to get the best readings she said it would be best to be off the pill for at least 2 weeks before taking the blood work. After discussing it with Matt we decided to go ahead and go off the pill and just let things happen as they're supposed to. The bloodwork came back fine but since we had already had the pregnancy "scare" we had really started talking about it and planning it and it was somehting we both just really wanted. I know my family and Adri (who is family) are not happy to hear that but it was a decision that was only for my husband and my own. For the both of us this was good timing. I would be done with student teaching before a baby came and Matt is not expected to deploy until May 2012 (but may get out of that since we PCS in June 2012). Omg....how am I going to be a married single mom? Matt may be getting OUT in 2012 (or whenever his ETS date is)...I don't know about the single mom life. Granted thousands upon thousands of military wives do it all the time and if they can I can. Wow rambling again. I really wish my husband were home so I can talk to someone about this!!!!!!!!!

How am I going to tell people? There are so many people that would want to know "first"- how do you do it? It's not like "normal" families for me. I have 2 people who are my "Mom" plus I'm super close to BOTH grandmothers. And then there's Matt's mom! I don't want to hurt anyone's feelings :-( Maybe I just mail everyone the sonogram at exactly the same time?... AH! I shouldn't be worrying about this but I am.

OMG I'm going to have a baby in a foreign country. Someone PLEASE come be with me!! Nana, Mary, Wella, Mom...someone????

OMG I can't have caffenine anymore...well screw it I'm finishing my diet green tea I'm in teh middle of drinking...what am I going to DO in the mornings??? Coffee is my life. Is just one cup bad? Maybe just the smell of it will wake me up...but then halfway through the day when I'm crashing and I have a major headache that only a coke can cure- then what? Caffenine headaches are the WORST and they don't go away!!!

OMG I drank wine this weekend...

Yup just took another test (7:25pm). This time it was a Clear Blue Digital (first time it was EPT with a plus sign). Pregnant popped up just about as soon as the urine hit it. Hahaha just thought about Juno seeing the test "That little blue plus sign is so unholy"...well I think it's pretty dang holy. Scary as all get out but holy none the less. Lord give me strength...



WebMD.com says:


Week 4
Baby:Your baby is still very small, only about 0.014 inches to 0.04 inches in length. The embryo, probably in about its second week of development, has multiplied to about 150 cells. Your baby is being nourished by secretions from the uterine lining. Layers of cells already are specialized according to functions. The outer layer will become the nervous system, skin and hair; the inner layer will be the breathing and digestive organs; and the middle layer will become the skeleton, bones, cartilage, muscles, circulatory system, kidneys and sex organs.

Mom-to-be:You're probably expecting your period this week, and if it doesn't occur it might be one of the first signs that you're pregnant. You may also notice light spotting as the embryo implants itself in your uterus. You might not feel any different yet, but the amniotic cavity, which will be filled with fluid, and the placenta, which will bring oxygen and nutrients to nourish your baby, are forming in your uterus.

Tip for the Week:Try to eat healthfully, which means choosing a variety of foods from the recommended food groups and drinking at least six to eight 8-ounce glasses of water a day. But you don't really need to "eat for two." You need only an extra 300 calories per day during pregnancy. And don't worry if your food intake drops a little in the beginning because of morning sickness. If you've been eating right already, your baby will get what it needs.

What’s Happening Inside You?
As the fertilized egg grows, a water-tight sac forms around it, gradually filling with fluid. This is called the amniotic sac, and it helps cushion the growing embryo.

The placenta also develops. The placenta is a round, flat organ that transfers nutrients from the mother to the baby, and transfers wastes from the baby.

A primitive face takes form with large dark circles for eyes. The mouth, lower jaw, and throat are developing. Blood cells are taking shape, and circulation will begin.

By the end of the first month, your baby is about 1/4 inch long - smaller than a grain of rice!

I'll be going to buy "What to Expect" tomorrow...although I read it with both my mom's pregnancies and scimmed it when my stepmom was pregnant with my youngest brother. I think I'll get way more out of it now!



OMG I am going to get SO FAT! I know that sounds dumb but I've been so weight conscience my WHOLE life (literally- when I was 6 I refused to go out in my bathing suit because I thought I was "fat"),,, Skinny girls who get pregnant are cute. Fat girls who get pregnant are just fatter. :-( I hope people will know that I'm pregnant...and that they can actually FEEL the baby when I'm farther along...

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